You Made Me

It happens sometimes.
It gets fucked up.
You grow up on the streets
Spitting on the floor
Smoking cigarettes
Getting in fights.

You try to find yourself
You know who you are
But you’re lost.

You spend afternoons
Listening to MTV
And pretending you are
A rock star

Pretending you mean
Something
To somebody…

Mom is late
Dad is gone
You have no
Brothers or sisters.

You have a cat that
Mom gave up
The only thing you loved

I don’t remember
Homework
I don’t remember
Sunday dinner.

I remember the
Kids in the neighborhood
And being alone.

It wasn’t my life
To live
I just happened
Not a plan

But I love you
Immensely
And I can’t let go
I know
Somewhere in
Your heart
You made me.

11/24/2010

God's Face

I show myself to you
And you believe me
Therefore,
I can not tell a
Lie.

This is who I am
What I am
With my help,
The universe has
Made it so.

I suffer.
But that is my cross
To bear.

I change
Everything around
Me.

At night, I cry
For what I have
Become

But in the
Morning I cry
For what I have
Given

Hope
Love
Faith

I give it all

And I am not
Sorry for it.

What do you see
When you look
In the mirror?

Do you see
Your own
Possibility?

Do you see
What God gave to
You?

Do you
Believe?

It’s one life
One moment
One chance
To change the
World.

To even feel
That it matters
Puts a smile
On God’s
Face.

5-2010

Sebastian

I came to you
But don’t know why

And you looked
At me that way

I held you in
Accepting arms
And you
Melted

I talked to you
You shared your secrets
Already knowing
Mine.

And when I left
You cried and cried

And a part of my heart
Was broken.

Nothing

Loving you means…

Lifting you up
Not dragging you down

It means showing you the light
Not living in the dark

Trepidation
Fear
Uncertainty

It’s all I have to offer

I think some days
We could be perfect

Forever real
Neverending

You stand before me
Like a mirror

And make me wonder
Who I am

And your sweet kiss
Awakens my soul

And your eyes
Pierce my heart
Like Cupid

Is it okay
That we are fumbled?

A jumbled mess
Forever lost?

Can we find the way
Together?
Or shall we be separately
Hidden?

I lay down and think of you
How I wish you were here

I know too much
About me and you

But pretend I know

Nothing.

imperfect

It’s funny how
far away
you can get
from yourself

so much so that
you are
unrecognizable
in the mirror

you let them
mold you
into what
they want
you to be

let them tell
you who
you are

and you go
along

maybe because
you’re tired
maybe because
you’re insecure

maybe because
they stopped
looking at
you

and then one
Saturday
someone stops
it all

pushes pause
on the movie
of your
life

stops you
looks at you
and says
yes, this will do

I always knew
I was special
always knew
I was beautiful

never knew
anyone really
noticed

and to know you
see this in me
lets me know
there’s so much
in you

real and raw
it feels so
right

to be
imperfect
in your arms.

lover's afternoon

there’s a pool of sweat
between your heart
and mine
remnants from
the love me made
and the lawn mower
buzzes
outside the window
yet the world is so
far away
the dog barks
and steals the peace
of a lover’s afternoon
and the clock ticks
the minutes away
soon the world
will be closer
but now the rain
begins to fall
hushing the dogs and
the gardeners
so we retreat
back to the peace
the world can wait

for tomorrow.

My Guardian Angel

She had an air about her
Some mystery unknown
And everyone wanted to
Touch her
But no one could reach her

She stood so high above
Us all
And we loved her
Like no one could love her
I, most of all

And we secretly
Wondered
What it would be like
To hold her close
Safe from harm
To be the one to save her
From whatever it was
She was running from

And I swear, one time
Our eyes met
And for a moment
The moment was real
Infinite, Eternal
But then it was gone

I long to return someday
To that moment in time
When all the world stood
Quiet and still
And she was the only one

Who Existed.